20 Funny / Thought-provoking one-liners.

From all the email forwards I receive, I most look forward (pun not-intended) to the ones from Nahida Jumde co-founder of Jumde Arts Copy. Her email forwards are quite selective and it’s the really funny or thought-provoking that passes through her filter which then sends across. If interested, you can write to her by clicking here, she’d be pleased to add you to her mailing list.

Here’s a list of one-liners I received yesterday. You may have heard some of them, nonetheless you’ll still find gems in there. My personal favourites are highlighted in bold. Do let me know which you liked the most. Cheerio!

1. Regular naps prevents old age… especially if you take them while driving.
2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee.
3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
4. They said we should all pay our taxes with a smile. I tried- but they wanted cash.
5. A child’s greatest period of growth is the month after you’ve purchased new school uniforms.
6. Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
7. Don’t marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without…but whatever you do, you’ll regret it later.
8. You can’t buy love… but you pay heavily for it.
9. True friends stab you in the front.
10. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.

11. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
12. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
13. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I’m wrong and she agrees with me.
14. Those who can’t laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
15. Ladies first…… Pretty ladies sooner.
16. It doesn’t matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
17. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.
18. Saving is the best thing…especially when your parents have done it for you.
19. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.
20. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books .

14 Comments

  1. Salaams Arif-Ali

    I am nicking these liners for my own BLOG…hope you don’t mind…if you do….well…as my 6 year old daughter says to me “Tough Luck” :)

  2. Thanks Venkatesh and Vishwanath,

    *sigh* wish had a bit more time to spend on my blog. Getting really swamped with work these days. Oh well, inshallah soon.

    Take care and keep smiling :-)
    Arif

  3. Heh. Quite sexist against men aren’t they?

    “I went to the store to buy some memory… for my grandparents.”

    “Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. ‘Yes’ is the answer.”

    “Look, if I agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.”

    “War doesn’t determine who’s right, is determines who is left.”

    “God is watching us. At least we can be entertaining.”

  4. Dear Arif

    I feel all those who can read, write and understand should appreciate your work.

    If they dont. Then complain to the almighty like Ghalib.

    ya rab ye na samje hai na samjenge meri baat
    na de inke dil aur,to muje jhubaan aur de.
    keep it up!

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